Chapter 7: A Message From Your Loyal Author
Now, I know what you are thinking. Do not try to deny it. You are likely wondering, "Who is the beast?" and "Why, dear narrator, have you abandoned me throughout this entire confusing tale and have decided to speak
now?"
Well dear reader, your questions will be answered quite soon actually. But for now, we must discuss book matters. I will hereby explain to you, dear reader, what this confusing tale is about.
It is about two wolves who live in a forest, and are magically chased by random hunters and suddenly, they land in a strange unknown castle where they run after some love-obsessed wolves only to find themselves meeting a five foot tall owl, who decides to dispose of them!
Now now, dear reader, don't give me such a confuzzled expression. I was just, how to you pronounce that phrase? Oh yes, just kidding. Now, don't look annoyed now. A good narrator must always have a good sense of humor, do they not?
Actually, this book is about two wolves who lived in a forest, were chased by hunters, and were saved by dawn wolves. The sister, Whiteclaw, gets a tour from a wolf named Mangopelt, (the guardian of herbs) who transports herself, and accidentally Whiteclaw, to the emerald kingdom, a dawn region. There lives the guardians, who howl the moon into the sky, rule over and guard all the regions with a respected eye, create laws and peace among the regions, and so on. But lately trouble has been stirring... I will leave it at that.
Now, oh look at the time, I very well must hurry up! I will quickly answer your cluttered pile of questions which you have taken the kindness to put them, not quite that well organized, right upon my delicate china desk which is an antique. You also brought me a glass of tea, probably as a bribe, which you have now spilled.
Wow, I must say, lovely manners. (That, my dear reader, is known as sarcasm.) Here, let me see. I must shuffle through these questions, one moment please.
Ok, let me see question number 1: "Who is the beast?" The beast is a giant blue lion, with extraordinary speed, a mind-shattering roar, and severe anger issues. He lives deep in the tunnels, lurking, and patiently waiting for his next victim.
Why, you may ask, is that terrible creature their Welcomer? (yes dear reader, I added a small laugh into my twisted tale. The terrifying, gigantic, mean lion is named, "Welcoming.") Well, he only acts rude if you are not welcomed, or are not a guest. (If you are welcomed, or a guest, he uses kind, polite manners, and usually invites you to a warm cup of tea.) Yet actually, he is very kind. He... sorry, I gave away too much. Next question.
question number 2: "Why dear narrator, have you abandoned me through th-
Readers these days! I cannot believe you ask me such a rude question like that, when the clear answer is, "I was busy." Next question.
question number 3: "Can I have that rare diamond ring back?" What rare diamond ring? Oh I see, its right on my table as yet another bribe.
Oh wait, it's gone. I am not suprised.
question number 4: Sorry for spilling the milk. It was an
accident. -quiet laughs and chuckles erupt nearby- Wait a moment, I hear something... Oh get over here! I know your hiding!
Oh, how wonderful. All my
important questions are now drenched in apple juice. Whichever selfish children who did this are quite rude. Now the only questions left are... (Picks up question) question number 5: That was an
accident too. Oh I've had it! Goodbye, and please enjoy the rest of the book.
-Mr.Loyal Author, or by my unformal name, "Joe, that guy who writes those crazy stories."